bun in the oven

Pregnant

There’s a bun in the oven. Not in mine, but my younger daughter’s. It’s her second child, and my third grandchild, growing in her belly, cells dividing, heart beating, forming in that miraculous way we do.

I was a mother at 19, and a grandmother at 38. For a long time I was in denial of that latter fact. It still amazes me that I am the grandmother of a teenager, when so many of my peers are still raising kids of their own.

But I am glad, now, that I procreated so young. And glad that my daughters have gone on to raise healthy beautiful boys, while they are still young. And now another unique and loved and cherished human being is doing his/her thing in the safe cave of Rhea’s womb. Amazing.

Jolly fat ladies

Tonight my dad wondered yet again why I choose to live on the other side of the world, when ALL of my family is far away. I don’t have a good answer for that, beyond “this feels like my right place”. But when Rhea tells me she wants me to come back now, and stay for a year, I hear her.

I just can’t go yet. I still belong here. No idea why, but I do.

But this song still makes me cry.

Leave a comment

6 Comments

  1. I may want you to come back for a year (or forever) but I will never ask you too. Same as I will never ask Jesse. You are both doing what you need to do, what is right for you, and that is the most important thing. When being here is what is right for you, I know you’ll be here in a flash :)

    Love you mum

    Reply
  2. exciting times. I know how hard it is to be so far away.
    Remain with your gut feeling to STAY. To BE.
    you seem to be shining!

    Reply
  3. Your daughter is wise.

    Reply
  4. This is a very “pregnant” post …. :)

    Reply
  5. mook

     /  September 15, 2012

    I understand the pull of blood, the yearnig for kin. especially a new life.
    oy.

    Reply
  1. #DoBraveThings by the #SMS – Week of September 2 | Messy Canvas

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s

%d bloggers like this: