For a week or more I thought it could go either way. Yes, he broke up with me, but he was no less confused afterwards than he was before. Some days he was so tender, so present with me, that I wondered if we could, perhaps, make it work after all.
But then the next day, he would go and see her.
I finally realized that I was keeping myself in a mental trap, and nothing would change unless I was the one to say Stop. No More. It’s Over. I’m Going. And with that came a sense of exhilaration. No longer am I trying to convince myself that this is for the best. Now I know it is.
Seeing that house ad yesterday gave me such a lift. Whether or not I like or get that particular place (I am viewing it on Friday morning), just knowing that I can move to a place that feeds my soul has given me such a sense of anticipation. I’ve stopped looking back. I’m heading out to a new life, a new adventure.
I didn’t have this the first time we broke up. I was bereft, and trying to make the best of it. This time I’m excited.
Life, it’s grand, isn’t it? Bring it on.